Spam Roundup January, 2020

There's spam, and then there's spam so oddly written it's somewhat amusing. Here's a roundup of some of the "best" comments I received this month from spambots around the world.

Cryptic life hacks

Sometimes comments come in that seem like sage advice. Or inscrutably sage advice.

- Cut the full lace wig, re-bond double-sided tape to fit your hairline. [Not sure what that has to do with anything I write about, but OK, I'll do that.]

- Another choice could cute matching couple cushion covers that will show that every night when you sleep you see him or her in your dreams. [Sounds positively marvie. Just curious, though -- was the first choice?]

- You essential just save in persuasion that your job is decriminalize and maintain yourself to protect a colourise cape.[I agree. All colorized capes should be decriminalized.]

"Lumbering along" a spambot fave!

Yes, this is what all the fuss is about.

This month spammers couldn't get enough of this post. The Straco Express Layout, Part 23 - Lumbering Along isn't my best writing, but who am I to argue? Glad to see this post about a cheap Japanese toy continues to fill a need.

- This post is invaluable. How can I find out more? [Just keep reading. This is part 23 of a 63-part series! ]

- That's what I was looking for, what a material! existing here at this site. [Imagine that!]

- What's up dear, are you really visiting this site regularly, if so afterward you will absolutely obtain good experience. [Eeeew. Now I feel all dirty.]

[And just to make sure all these accolades don't go to my head, there's this:]
- I believed this put up used to be good. [Ouch.]

Tell me a story

[I don't often quote the entire comment, but this one's a beaut.]

- An impressive share! I have just forwarded this onto a colleague who has been conducting a little homework on this. And he actually ordered me lunch because I found it for him... lol. So allow me to reword this... Thanks for the meal! But yeah, thanks for spending time to talk about this matter here on your site.

Seems pretty convincing, except I received this exact same email on 20 different posts, all with different subjects (note how vague the writer is about that). It looks like the year's off to a great start. Let's all work to make 2020 the year colorized capes become street-legal!